My mood swings are intense. The other day I was planning how I could hang myself from my wardrobe and today I spent £50 on stationary for Uni. So I have £5 left to spend on food for an entire week. I can’t beg my parents for any more money. I’m embarrassed.
Why would a suicidal person bother buying stationary? Because I’m not suicidal today. I’m sure I will be again at some-point in the next few weeks though.
Why do I turn to suicide/alcohol/ sleeping tablets as soon as anything gets tough? Because my mood swings are so severe! Those thoughts of hopelessness and anguish block take over me and seem to come over me so fast.
My antidepressants don’t seem to level me out. I hope I get referred to a councillor/ CBT soon.
I always have people telling me “your soo bipolar”, I can see where they may be coming from. My father is a psychologist and laughs when I ask if I could be bipolar.
Ah well. Glad I’m on the up. For now…